The differences in personality between my kids is just so entertaining to me. While I do believe in certain overall parenting approaches (do you know the love and logic books? Very helpful I think), as a pediatrician I also see almost daily families with 2,3,4 kids where the approach that worked great with one or two of them does nothing for the next one. The parents go “I thought we were just such good parents but I guess not, the first kid was just more laid back in retrospect ” or something like that. There’s no universal approach, same as in anything, you truly have to enjoy getting to discover each child alongside them and then slowly figure out what works and what doesn’t. I agree, it is very worthwhile, and so much fun!
One pet peeve is how adults think all teens are these disrespectful nightmare types. I know so many upstanding, respectful, outright admirable teens (we have lots of homeschool friends), the “you know how teens are” thing seems like an easy out for certain parents. But who knows, mine are so young, ask me again in 20…
Ugh, wine moms. At least when other mothers profess their obsession with drinking rosé and talking smack about their own children, I know to stay clear of them. Demonic energy.
Parenting is super hard, but they really divide your sorrows and multiple your joys—just gotta put in the work! Be present, consistent, loving. Takes tons of intentionality. They make you grow so much, its such a blessing.
Expecting my second child, and we are so excited to meet him or her. My first girl, likes it all—the rough house with daddy and the princess stuff. We never really peddled gendered things, but boy does she loves unicorns! She also loves learning how to punch and use swords. Kids are just the best.
DNA. Nature. Nurture. It’s all of that. I have two very opposite children. While both have amazing attributes they couldn’t be more different. Both raised by me. Dad 1 was an alcoholic. And dad 2 walked away when the second was on the way. So whatever. I pulled it together and raised community contributing women. Hooray!! I brought faith into their lives, worked hard so they could both have the best education possible and my youngest is a star athlete in her sport. Yes, I shielded them the best I could. They came home with problems and challenges but we never let either get in the way. My oldest is comfortable and living a very full life through traveling with her longtime boyfriend. While my youngest is preparing to go to college. So from all they were exposed to (good or bad) made them the humans that are. Ambitious and constantly curious. Proud Mom!
Great post. Yes, its very common for everyone to complain about how hard it is to raise kids. I see parents with 1-2 kids complaining, well you know what, 150 years ago imagine how much more difficult it was.
No dishwasher, no running water (in many cases), no refrigeration, cell phones, etc., the conveniences of life. You worked sunup until sundown, all day every day. Plus you had 6-8 kids.
Societally, we emphasize individualism and this spills over into parenthood - many feel they can't pursue their own agenda (which for most, are just vices) while also be a parent.
Can you write a post on disciplining your children? Since each child is different (DNA), the parenting and disciplining techniques differ and we would be interested in seeing how you approach this.
Love the parenting posts 🙏 welcomed our first in January and trying for a 2nd. I kick myself looking back because I was one of those people who bought into the “get married and wait to have kids” hype. Having a child is the greatest blessing.
I distinctly remember the greatest ER doc I ever saw, rotating with him in med school. He was so freaking good, so calm under pressure, just so impressive, I wanted to be just like him… until one afternoon when I learned he basically didn’t know his own kids’ names (exaggerating, but not much, he just was never home to be with them, missed so much of their lives). I knew I could never be like that. So yeah I too gave up “earning potential” for quality time with the family, and it is the best decision I ever made
The differences in personality between my kids is just so entertaining to me. While I do believe in certain overall parenting approaches (do you know the love and logic books? Very helpful I think), as a pediatrician I also see almost daily families with 2,3,4 kids where the approach that worked great with one or two of them does nothing for the next one. The parents go “I thought we were just such good parents but I guess not, the first kid was just more laid back in retrospect ” or something like that. There’s no universal approach, same as in anything, you truly have to enjoy getting to discover each child alongside them and then slowly figure out what works and what doesn’t. I agree, it is very worthwhile, and so much fun!
Thank you for the great post.
Feels like the minute they pop out they already are showing their personality.
One pet peeve is how adults think all teens are these disrespectful nightmare types. I know so many upstanding, respectful, outright admirable teens (we have lots of homeschool friends), the “you know how teens are” thing seems like an easy out for certain parents. But who knows, mine are so young, ask me again in 20…
Ugh, wine moms. At least when other mothers profess their obsession with drinking rosé and talking smack about their own children, I know to stay clear of them. Demonic energy.
Parenting is super hard, but they really divide your sorrows and multiple your joys—just gotta put in the work! Be present, consistent, loving. Takes tons of intentionality. They make you grow so much, its such a blessing.
Expecting my second child, and we are so excited to meet him or her. My first girl, likes it all—the rough house with daddy and the princess stuff. We never really peddled gendered things, but boy does she loves unicorns! She also loves learning how to punch and use swords. Kids are just the best.
Great post!
Brilliant closing. Thank you for your writing.
Loved this one Mike. Timely, especially given Im a new dad.
Good timing for this, referenced this piece in my thoughts when dealing w/ a situation w/ my son
DNA. Nature. Nurture. It’s all of that. I have two very opposite children. While both have amazing attributes they couldn’t be more different. Both raised by me. Dad 1 was an alcoholic. And dad 2 walked away when the second was on the way. So whatever. I pulled it together and raised community contributing women. Hooray!! I brought faith into their lives, worked hard so they could both have the best education possible and my youngest is a star athlete in her sport. Yes, I shielded them the best I could. They came home with problems and challenges but we never let either get in the way. My oldest is comfortable and living a very full life through traveling with her longtime boyfriend. While my youngest is preparing to go to college. So from all they were exposed to (good or bad) made them the humans that are. Ambitious and constantly curious. Proud Mom!
Great post. Yes, its very common for everyone to complain about how hard it is to raise kids. I see parents with 1-2 kids complaining, well you know what, 150 years ago imagine how much more difficult it was.
No dishwasher, no running water (in many cases), no refrigeration, cell phones, etc., the conveniences of life. You worked sunup until sundown, all day every day. Plus you had 6-8 kids.
Societally, we emphasize individualism and this spills over into parenthood - many feel they can't pursue their own agenda (which for most, are just vices) while also be a parent.
Can you write a post on disciplining your children? Since each child is different (DNA), the parenting and disciplining techniques differ and we would be interested in seeing how you approach this.
Love the parenting posts 🙏 welcomed our first in January and trying for a 2nd. I kick myself looking back because I was one of those people who bought into the “get married and wait to have kids” hype. Having a child is the greatest blessing.
Cerno I see another book on the horizon for you. Parenting 101
I distinctly remember the greatest ER doc I ever saw, rotating with him in med school. He was so freaking good, so calm under pressure, just so impressive, I wanted to be just like him… until one afternoon when I learned he basically didn’t know his own kids’ names (exaggerating, but not much, he just was never home to be with them, missed so much of their lives). I knew I could never be like that. So yeah I too gave up “earning potential” for quality time with the family, and it is the best decision I ever made